Sextortion, Silence and Suicide Risk: What We’re Getting Wrong About Boys and Young Men
- Apr 13
- 4 min read
By Steve Whittle
Over the past few weeks, a disturbing trend has been gaining attention across the UK.
Authorities are reporting a sharp rise in “sextortion” cases, where young people are manipulated online into sharing explicit images and then blackmailed. What’s particularly concerning is this:
The majority of victims are boys and young men.
The National Crime Agency (NCA) has warned that financially motivated sextortion targeting teenage boys is now one of the fastest-growing threats to young people in the UK. https://www.nationalcrimeagency.gov.uk/news/nca-issues-urgent-warning-about-sextortion-targeting-teenage-boys
This is not just a cybercrime issue. It’s a mental health issue. And increasingly, it’s a suicide prevention issue.
What Is Sextortion?
Sextortion typically follows a predictable pattern:
A young person is contacted online (often via social media or gaming platforms)
A relationship is quickly established
They are encouraged or pressured to share an intimate image
The interaction rapidly shifts into blackmail
Threats are made to send the image to friends, family, or followers
In many cases, these crimes are carried out by organised networks operating at scale, often targeting multiple victims simultaneously.
Why Are Boys and Young Men Being Targeted?
This is where most conversations stop too early.
It’s easy to frame sextortion as a problem of:
online safety
poor digital awareness
criminal behaviour
All true. None sufficient.
To understand the pattern, we need to look at behaviour.
The Internet Watch Foundation (IWF) has reported a growing number of cases involving boys being targeted in sexual extortion scams, with increasing concern around underreporting. https://www.iwf.org.uk/news-media/news/sextortion-cases-involving-boys-increasing/
The NSPCC and Childline have also highlighted that boys are less likely to disclose experiences of sexual exploitation and more likely to delay seeking help.https://www.nspcc.org.uk/about-us/news-opinion/2024/childline-boys-sexual-abuse-support/
That reluctance matters.
Because sextortion doesn’t just rely on access. It relies on silence.
The Role of Shame
Sextortion works because it weaponises something powerful:
Shame.
The fear of:
being judged
being exposed
disappointing family
losing social status
can feel overwhelming.
The Child Exploitation and Online Protection Command (CEOP) warns that victims often feel trapped and may believe there is no way out once threats escalate.https://www.ceopeducation.co.uk/parents/articles/what-is-sextortion/
For a teenager — particularly a boy navigating identity, masculinity and peer pressure — that fear can escalate quickly.
When Silence Becomes Dangerous
One of the most consistent patterns across safeguarding and suicide prevention work is this:
The people most at risk are often the least likely to ask for help.
In sextortion cases, that pattern is amplified.
Victims may:
withdraw socially
avoid communication
comply with escalating demands
feel trapped in a cycle of control
The NSPCC has warned that online sexual exploitation can have serious and lasting impacts on mental health, including anxiety, distress and feelings of isolation.https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/online-safety/sexting/
In some cases — rare but real — the psychological impact has been linked to suicide.
That’s why this matters beyond safeguarding. This sits firmly in the suicide prevention conversation.
This Isn’t Just About the Internet
There’s a risk in focusing only on the platform.
Yes, technology enables this crime. Yes, regulation matters. Yes, platforms have responsibility.
But if we stop there, we miss the point.
Sextortion doesn’t just exploit technology. It exploits behaviour.
It exploits:
silence
stigma
fear of exposure
reluctance to seek help
Those are not technical problems. They are human ones.
What Needs to Change
If we’re serious about prevention, we need to move beyond messages like:
“Don’t share images.” “Be careful online.” “Report suspicious behaviour.”
Important. But incomplete.
We need to address why boys are vulnerable in the first place.
1. Make early conversations normal
Boys need to know:
mistakes happen
they won’t be judged
support exists without losing identity or respect
2. Reduce the power of shame
The less shame attached to:
sexual development
online mistakes
vulnerability
the less leverage perpetrators have.
3. Shift from “tell us” to “we’ll come to you”
Many boys will not initiate disclosure.
That means:
parents
teachers
coaches
leaders of spaces
need to check in first.
4. Treat sextortion as a mental health issue, not just a crime
Because the damage is not just legal.
It’s psychological. And sometimes, it escalates.
A Message to Boys and Young Men
If you’re being threatened or blackmailed online:
You are not alone
You have not done anything that justifies being exploited
This is a known and growing crime
Support is available and can help stop it
Speaking to a trusted adult or reporting the issue can feel difficult, but it is the most effective way to regain control.
Final Thought
Sextortion is growing.
But the pattern behind it is familiar.
pressure builds quietly
shame keeps it hidden
support is delayed
intervention comes late
We see this across male mental health again and again.
If we want to reduce harm, we need to intervene earlier.
Not just at the point of crisis.But at the point where silence begins.
Sources
National Crime Agency – Sextortion warning
Internet Watch Foundation – Sextortion cases involving boys
NSPCC / Childline – Boys and sexual exploitation
CEOP – Sextortion guidance
NSPCC – Online safety and sexting
Steve Whittle is an award-winning workplace suicide prevention specialist and the founder of Tough To Talk.
Drawing on lived experience of suicide attempts and bereavement, Steve has become a nationally recognised voice on male suicide prevention, working within male-dominated industries to address the cultural and structural factors that drive silence and risk.
A certified suicide first aid assessor and tutor, Steve advises organisations across industry, sport and the emergency services on embedding upstream prevention, strengthening early intervention and aligning practice with emerging standards such as BS 30480.
His work focuses on reducing suicide risk before crisis develops, building workplace capability, and reshaping cultures where men are more likely to struggle in silence than seek support.
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